Shavua Tov?

I know it has been a while since I have done a real "me and my life" post. I feel the need to do so now, so bear with me. For what it's worth, this WILL be a TMI post. So anyone who is squeemish or somehow tznius, probably shouldn't read this post.

Thursday I had major ovarian pains. Since I have infertility issues, I emailed my specialist who told me to come in Friday morning. So I called my husband and left a message for him to call me. He called me hours later to ask me some random question, and before I had a chance to tell him about the appointment, he got another call and said he would call me back. By the time I was on the way home in my carpool, I still hadnt heard from him, so I called him in the car. I said, "I didnt hear back from you, but I wanted you to know that I am going to see Dr. M in the morning." Since I havent seen Dr. M since the LAST time I had the same pains, I thought that he understood that it was unusual for me to be going. I thought he would understand that he had to take our son to daycare, since I would be going to Dr. M. I thought wrong. Thursday evening I was playing with my son and he accidentally poked me in the eye and all I could see out of my right eye was blurriness. So first thing Friday morning (after my appointment with Dr. M) I knew I had to go to the eye doctor. When my husband came home Thursday night he told me he had to be in L.I. at 8 am. I said, "What about taking our son to daycare?" He said "Oh, I didn't realize that you meant you wanted me to take him to daycare." So I did it all that morning. Our son got to daycare by 8. I got to Dr. M by 8:30 and then to the eye doctor by 9:20. Back to my office by 9:40. Not bad, except the rest of the day all I could see was a blur (I have a cut near my pupil and the nerves are exposed). AND, I forgot my keys at home. My husband decided that since I would be leaving at normal time (3 PM) and he was also leaving that time, we would get home around the same time so he had no need to bring the keys to my office (which is only 10 minutes out of his way). I got home a couple minutes after him. All I can say is that my nerves were so shot, that it is just lucky that the timing worked out well.

When I went to pick my son up from daycare, he was there, with his PT, and no one else. Which, to me, was very upsetting. There should have been a daycare person there as well. Well, it slipped my mind by the time I got home to tell my husband. We had two hours (almost exactly) to get ready for Shabbos and nothing was cooked yet. There were some leftovers from Rosh Hashana, but a meat needed to be made (my husband's department) and I had to make some other foods as well. My husband decided he would make the meat first (meatloaf) and then I could have the kitchen. Fine. So he said it shouldn't take long. Fine. Well, I was sitting and playing with my son and time is going by. A half hour later I asked him if he was almost done. He snapped at me that he would be done soon. OK. Fine. Ten minutes later I asked him what time Shabbos is. He snapped at me that he would be done soon. Forty minutes or so from when he started, the meatloaf went into the oven. The kicker was he asked me what MY problem was.

So I didnt cook all that I had planned on cooking, because I simply had no time and frankly, no inclination. About 20 minutes to candlelighting I finished what I had to do in the kitchen and came into the bedroom to watch my son. I had forgotten what time my husband said Shabbos is, so I asked again what time is Shabbos. He told me and then I said "Go take your shower first." Well, the phone rang somewhere around that time and he started shmoozing with his father. I didnt get in the shower until 6 minutes to candle lighting time. No apologies, nothing. All this is, of course, my fault. Because I am snappy. Because I am not sensitive. Or some crap like that.

During dinner, my husband told me about his work day. I told him a bit about my day. Then he asked me how our son's day at daycare was. When I told him about there not being any daycare person there when I picked up our son, my husband went BALLISTIC. Why didn't I tell him this from the beginning? When was I going to tell him? It isn't like he expected me to call him right away, but I should have told him before he told me about his whole day and I told him about my day. Well, EXCUSE me! It slipped my mind. Between getting ready for Shabbos and dodging his attitude, when did he THINK I was going to tell him? So then he said to me, this isn't the first time you haven't told me immediately when something happened. The G-d's honest truth, I didn't remember what incident he meant. I still am hazy about it. It had something to do with my son falling. Except for the time he fell and had an egg size bump though, I didn't always report the fall immediately because heck, he is a kid who ALWAYS falls. So I suggested to my husband that he go pick up our son and then he will know the report for the day first hand. He didn't find that suggestion amusing. It ended up that I slept on the couch for the better half of the night. I simply had no desire to be near my husband.

Shavua tov? It's mikvah night tomorrow night. G-d help me to get some interest in it before then.